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By Lee Todd Lacks

Patricia was tired of pretending
to be pure, in keeping with her
people's tradition, the princess
was supposed to be
demure, until one day
she strayed into the poplar wood
where she found a pagan priestess
paying homage to Pan
and she petitioned her respectfully
"Pious priestess, a potion I ask of thee
so that I might pursue my most promiscuous
desires without a moment's pause, pull off my prim and
proper gown and my plethora of prissy petticoats so that
I might present my palpitating passageways to any and all partners!"
"Patricia," the high priestess proclaimed, "I shall grant thy
perilous request provided that you promise
never to protest if and when any of your prospective partners
prefer to punish your plump posterior prior to pleasuring it."
"I promise," pledged the princess, and she never returned
to the palace, again.

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